How Child Custody Mediation Works in Illinois

In this blog, we share “How Child Custody Mediation Works in Illinois” a step-by-step overview to help parents understand the process, reduce conflict, and move forward with clarity and respect.

When parents separate or divorce in Illinois, one of the most important and emotional decisions they’ll make involves their children. The court system recognizes this, which is why child custody mediation in Illinois is often required or strongly encouraged. Mediation allows parents to resolve custody and parenting issues without going to trial saving time, money, and stress for everyone involved.

Whether court-ordered or voluntary, understanding how the process works can help you prepare and participate more effectively.

What Is Child Custody Mediation?

Mediation is a confidential process where a neutral third party (the mediator) helps parents reach an agreement about parental responsibilities (formerly called custody) and parenting time (visitation). The goal is to create a workable parenting plan that puts the child’s best interests first and helps parents avoid the uncertainty of a judge’s ruling.

In Illinois, family law courts often refer parents to mediation before a contested custody hearing. Mediation can also be pursued privately at any time, even before a case is filed.

What Issues Are Covered in Mediation?

During child custody mediation, parents will work through topics such as:

• Where the child will live (primary residence)

• How much time the child will spend with each parent

• Holiday, vacation, and summer break schedules

• Transportation arrangements for exchanges

• Decision-making responsibilities (healthcare, education, religion, etc.)

• Communication methods between parents

If an agreement is reached, the parenting plan can be submitted to the court for approval. Once signed by a judge, it becomes legally binding.

Is Mediation Required in Illinois?

In many counties in Illinois, mediation is required when parents can’t agree on custody and parenting time. Each county sets its own rules, but in general:

• Court-ordered mediation is mandatory in disputed parenting cases

• Parents must attend before the court will schedule a hearing

• Exceptions may apply in cases involving domestic violence or safety concerns

Private mediation, on the other hand, is voluntary but it offers more flexibility and can help families stay out of court entirely.

How Long Does Mediation Take?

The length of mediation depends on the complexity of your situation and how well you and the other parent communicate. Many people complete mediation in 1 to 3 sessions, each lasting about 1 to 2 hours. However, more complex parenting issues such as long-distance parenting or high-conflict situations may require five or more sessions to fully resolve.

At Illinois Mediation Clinic, we tailor the process to your family’s needs while keeping things efficient and focused.

What If We Can’t Agree?

Mediation doesn’t always result in a full agreement — and that’s okay. Even partial agreements can save time in court and help reduce conflict. If no agreement is reached on some or all issues:

• The mediator may file a report with the court (only noting whether mediation occurred, not what was said)

• The judge will then make decisions based on evidence and testimony

That said, many families are surprised by how much progress they can make in mediation especially with an experienced and neutral guide at the table.

Benefits of Mediation for Parenting Plans

• Cost-Effective: Mediation is usually far less expensive than litigation

• Faster Resolution: You control the timeline, not the court’s

• Child-Focused: Keeps the conversation centered on what’s best for your children

• Private and Confidential: Avoids public court battles and records

• More Control: Parents make the decisions instead of a judge

Choosing the Right Mediator

Not all mediators are alike. For parenting disputes, it’s important to choose someone who:

• Is experienced in family law and Illinois parenting statutes

• Knows how to manage conflict and keep discussions respectful

• Understands child development and co-parenting dynamics

At Illinois Mediation Clinic, our mediators are trained attorneys who focus on helping families move forward not just settle disputes. We provide both court-approved and private mediation services across Central Illinois and beyond.

Frequently Asked Questions Regarding Child Custody Mediation 

Q: Can I bring an attorney with me to mediation?A: You can consult with an attorney before or after mediation sessions, but most mediation sessions are attended by the parents only. However, your mediator can guide you on whether legal support during sessions is appropriate for your case.

Q: Is what we say in mediation confidential?

A: Yes. Mediation is a confidential process. The mediator cannot testify about what was said during mediation unless there’s a legal exception (such as concerns about child safety).

Q: What if I feel unsafe or uncomfortable in mediation?

A: Safety is always the top priority. If you have concerns about domestic violence, harassment, or emotional distress, inform the mediator in advance. In some cases, mediation may be conducted separately or may not be appropriate.

Q: Do both parents have to live in Illinois to participate?

A: No. Mediation can still take place even if one parent lives out of state. Virtual sessions are available and often helpful in these situations.

Q: Is the parenting agreement we reach final?

A: Once both parties sign the agreement and a judge approves it, the parenting plan becomes a court order. Until then, it’s considered a draft and can be adjusted.

How to Get Started With Child Custody Mediation in Illinois

Contact us today to get started